I am stuck at 37.5. Sucked into Mindful Meditation for hours each night. Listening to tapes, attended Rick Hanson’s Lecture at Spirit Rock on the Neurology of Awakening … how to change your mind through mindful meditation. Ah, so much work…

Reexamining constantly reexamining pre-set notions of who I am and how I believe others perceive me in the world and if I actually have a chance of pulling this off. There is no consistency in this effort. Even within one day.

Reality shifts from hour to hour.

Now there is talk of introducing a low dose of another medication to help with the final cut back to 0 of the Effexor XR. Cranial Sacral work helps as does the yoga and aerobics.

That’s about it.

Supplements I am supposed to be taking include: folic acid, samE, lithate, pregnenalone, 5000 mg Omegas, DHEA, Thyroxin, Cognitex, UBQH, L’Tyrosine. mega Vitamin D. And that doesn’t even include the Energy Drink or the Calm Cal-Mag drink. All this combined with the 37.5 and the remainining Klonopin, which we have decided to hold off on until the Effexor is gone.


Yoga for Depression
The physical and psychological effects of meditation (Institute of
Noetic Sciences)

Dr. Dan Siegel on Neuroplasticity and Mindfulness Meditation Training
Self-Directed Neuroplasticity,. Mindfulness, and Meditation.
Mindfulness, Meditation and Neuroplasticity

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1 Comment

  1. Oh! My dear. I recognize the tension in your face and the anxiety in your post. I can feel how tightly your jaw is clenched. Mine was just like that for years. I can still feel the strain. I did yoga, mindfulness, abdominal breathing, dietary changes, exercise, positive thinking, CBT, etc. It all helped somewhat, but I was still obsessing about how others viewed me, about past mistakes, about worthlessness.

    You may not want to hear this, especially on this website, but my deep, lasting relief occurs when I go back on an appropriate amount of Effexor for my brain. It allows me to think clearly and I can see clearly that I am a worthwhile human being, something I absolutely can not see when I am off it. I have quit a number of times and have finally, finally admitted that it allows me to be the person I want to be and I am staying on it.

    I’m sure you have great reasons for giving up Effexor. Perhaps it never worked for you. But if it did, it might be worth evaluating whether it is worth the hell you are going through just to be off it. I decided that it wasn’t. My brain needs the neurochemical boost.

    I wish you the best in whatever decision you make. Just know that your brain is making you believe lies about reality and about yourself. You are valuable and valued.

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